


The Hug Guru, or The Very Super-Serious Business of the Art of Hugging

by MaxWrite



Category: Actor RPF, American Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, Star Trek RPF
Genre: Humor, M/M, RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-05
Updated: 2011-01-05
Packaged: 2017-10-18 13:27:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/189348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaxWrite/pseuds/MaxWrite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><a href="http://community.livejournal.com/trek_rpf_kink/2887.html?thread=3040327#t3040327">This prompt</a>: <i>Chris asks Simon to give him hugging lessons. Inspired by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mgf2XeEjQbk&feature=player_embedded">this interview</a>.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hug Guru, or The Very Super-Serious Business of the Art of Hugging

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why they're doing all this outside. Perhaps so that the sunlight can glint tantalizingly in the baby-blue and steel-blue eyes of Chris and Simon, respectively? Yes, let's go with that.

Simon stepped outside. It would be a while before Quinto stopped giggling, so he thought he'd take a moment to himself to go over his lines again. Sure, this was only a rehearsal, but he was nothing if not a perfectionist. He stood outside in the warm California air and squinted at the ridiculous red paper his script was printed on.

Suddenly, the door he'd come out of burst open and out popped a whirlwind of blondish hair. Chris strode purposefully several paces away from the building before he finally thought to glance back and to the left of the door to where Simon stood.

"Oh, there you are," Chris said, turning and coming back. He shoved his hands in his pockets as he approached. "Nice day, huh?"

"Gorgeous," Simon said, adjusting his ball cap. "Just like the day before and the day before that. Bit like _Groundhog Day_ for weather men."

Chris chuckled. "Yep, you know what they say about California weather."

Simon waited patiently for Chris to continue. When he didn't, Simon asked, "What do they say?"

"You know, that it's … the same all the time or whatever. Hey, listen, man, um, I was wondering if you could do me a solid."

"Like what?"

"I just wanted to know …" Chris shuffled his feet. "Um … could you maybe help me out with my hugs?"

A corner of Simon's mouth twitched upward. "Your what?"

"My _hugs_. You know how everyone says they suck."

Simon did know. He shook his head in pity, examining Chris's face as though he was some kind of bizarre anomaly. "I don't understand how you can get a hug so wrong."

"I know, I know," Chris groaned, wincing. "I dunno, either, but you're, like, an expert, so –"

"Whoa, wait, _I'm_ an expert? Why do you say that?"

"Everybody says that."

"Who's everybody?"

Chris jerked a thumb back toward the door. "Everybody. Karl, Zoe, J.J., everybody. You're good at hugging both women _and_ men. You're all, you know, comfortable expressing affection. I dunno what that is, maybe it's a British thing."

"Heh, no, definitely not a British thing," Simon chuckled. The fact was he had thought a lot about the art of the hug, but that didn't mean he wanted anybody knowing that. It was supposed to appear effortless on his part. "So, what do you want me to do, just … hug you?"

"Well, yeah, just show me what you do."

"But you've hugged me before."

"Yeah, but I wasn't taking notes."

Simon smirked. "You plan on taking notes?"

"Well … mental notes."

Simon laughed again. "Right. Erm …" He held his arms out to Chris, still clutching his script in one hand. "Come on, then, give us a cuddle."

Chris grinned like a kid on Christmas and fell into Simon's arms with comical enthusiasm, squeezing him too hard.

"Okay, problem number one," Simon said, his voice straining against Chris's crushing arms. Chris released him, his smile gone, his face now deadly serious, like he was cramming for an important quiz. Simon coughed a little as he said, "Problem number one: people need to breathe."

"Too much, huh?"

"You're a human corset."

Chris's impressive eyebrows knitted together as he nodded. Simon remained quiet, patient, imagining actual notes being scribbled across Chris's brain.

"Okay, let's try again," Chris said, holding his arms out again.

"Stop," Simon said, holding up a hand. "No, don't move, keep your arms up."

Chris froze, looking like a deer in headlights who wanted to snuggle. "What? What'd I do?"

"Have a look at your arms."

Chris looked at the right one, then at the left, then at Simon again. "What?"

"Looks like you're trying to hug a bus."

"Oh," Chris said, finally lowering his arms.

"I mean, I'm trying not to feel inadequate here, but there's no way my physique can live up to all that. A Pre-Hug Space like that would make Karl feel diminutive."

"Pre-hug space?"

"Yes, the space in which the hug is to take place, also known as First Position."

"Right, right," Chris said with a nod. "So, holding my arms open that much doesn't necessarily convey enthusiasm?"

"Oh, it conveys enthusiasm, but it's not the kind that makes one want to get anywhere near you. It's the kind that makes one wonder if you're out on a day pass."

"Mm, got it. Not so big, then."

"You want to start out with something that's not too far off from your huggee's actual width. You want it just a tiny bit wider than they are to convey the enthusiasm you spoke of, but not so wide that you appear crazy. Then, as your huggee approaches, adjust accordingly. This can also give the impression that perhaps you see your huggee as thinner than they actual are, which can only work to your advantage, flattering your huggee, if only subconsciously, and making them feel more comfortable submitting to the hug."

"Ahh, very clever. Okay, let's give it another shot."

The two men embraced again. Simon hugged Chris like he'd hug any guy he felt relatively close to. It was a full hug, his right hand flat to Chris's spine while his left held his script to Chris's back, his body achieving full contact. Chris felt tense in his arms and then decided to punctuate his hug with back pats.

Simon winced. "Are you attempting to burp me?"

"What?"

With a sigh, Simon pulled back to look up at Chris, but stayed in his arms. "The Back Pat. It's a Filler Move, the kind of thing you do when you feel the need to fill the Hug Space with something other than your own body. It's also used as a way to signal the end of a hug, kinda like tapping out of a wrestling match, but this ain't wrestling, Chris. It's a _hug_. If it feels like a fight, you ain't doin' it right."

Chris silently mouthed the rhyme to himself.

"It should be easy and pleasant, not a struggle. Okay, yes, things like pats and rubs can be used as Comforting Mechanisms or Supplementary Affection Gestures, but you weren't comforting me and you weren't trying to display any extra affection, so I know you were only doing it because you felt insecure. But the thing is, if you're comfortable hugging, and you're comfortable with the person you're hugging, the hug will come to a natural conclusion that should feel organic for both parties. There should be no need for Artificial Termination Signals or Diversionary Tactics to distract you both from the fact that your bodies are touching."

Chris's brow furrowed again. "Seriously?"

"What?"

"Is it really all that complicated? I mean, 'Artificial Termination Signals' and 'Diversionary Tactics' … It's a _hug_."

"You see? That right there is exactly the kind of attitude that got you into this mess in the first place, isn't it?"

Chris lowered his gaze and mumbled, "Yeah, I guess."

"Are you taking this seriously, Christopher?"

"Yes, sir."

"I didn't hear you."

Chris rolled his eyes and said more clearly, "Yes, sir, I am taking it seriously, I just don't understand why there needs to be so much involved."

"There doesn't, really. Once you get good at it, it becomes second nature."

Chris sighed and looked into Simon's eyes. Simon watched him, watched for the moment when things would click into place for him, that moment of realization that happens for any good student.

And there it was. Chris's features relaxed, his mouth dropped open slightly and his pupils even seemed to dilate a little as he stared into Simon's eyes. Simon smiled at him.

"You see?" Simon said gently, his hand naturally rubbing up and down on Chris's back. "You see that?"

"We're still hugging," Chris said, uttering the words as though the very secrets of the universe were dancing off his tongue. "And it's not weird."

"Not at all."

"It's actually really nice. _Damn_ , you're cuddly."

Simon chuckled. "Well, thank you – oh, wait now," he said as he felt Chris squeeze him a little. "See that right there? What you just did?"

Chris froze, his body tensing. "I'm sorry."

"No, no, no, it's good! You went with what felt right. You're comfortable with me and you established that I'm comfortable with you, and that allowed you to express yourself freely within the Hug Space. That's what it's all about, mate. Comfort and contact. You felt like cuddling, and it was okay to do so, so you did it. It was genuine, unlike what you did the first time you hugged me."

Chris grinned and Simon felt his body relax. "You're kind of amazing, you know that, Pegg?"

Simon felt his face blushing. He decided to change the subject before he could get too flustered. "Oh, stop it, and give us a hug."

They hugged each other tight once again, and the difference in Chris's embrace was obvious. He was relaxed, he was comfortable, he was enjoying it. And when they finally loosened their grips on each other, Chris should have let Simon go without hesitation, without feeling awkward about ending the hug too soon or too late. It should have been easy.

But Chris didn't let him go, he held on, and what made Simon's brain stall was the fact that he, himself, was ready to end the hug, that given how comfortable they were with each other, the feeling should have been mutual. But Chris clearly wasn't ready to let go and seemed perfectly fine with that. There was no awkwardness on his part. He simply gazed serenely into Simon's eyes.

"Erm …" Simon stammered. He was starting to think he'd somehow managed to desensitize Chris completely to the dreaded Hug Awkwardness. _Damn, I'm good,_ he thought. But wait, no, that wasn't it. There was something else in Chris's eyes.

Chris's lips were on his a moment later. Simon froze, eyes staring past Chris's head in shock. He felt Chris's big hands caressing his back, and there was nothing awkward or artificial about it. This was a genuine Supplementary Affection Gesture.

 _Oh, sweet lord._

By the time their lips parted, Simon's eyes had slid shut and his body had relaxed, and when Chris pulled his mouth away, Simon just stood there for a moment, eyelids too heavy to raise, lips still pursed. He opened his eyes and relaxed his mouth slowly, as though his muscles were moving through molasses, and he blinked up at Chris in a daze.

"What the hell was that?" Simon asked, but there was no malice in his voice; only confusion.

"Too much?" Chris asked in a low murmur.

"I … you … _what_?"

Chris grinned and chuckled. "You're cute as hell when you're confused. But we should head inside before J.J. has an aneurysm."

He finally let Simon go, and for the first time Simon had to let a man go before he was ready to do so.

"I'll … be in, in a minute," Simon said absently, staring off at nothing.

"You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm just … processing."

"Well, when you're done 'processing' … come find me."

Simon looked up at him and found Chris's twinkly blue eyes smiling at him. Chris gave him a wink, then turned and headed inside. Simon just stared as the door swung shut behind Chris's perfect, denim-clad backside.

END


End file.
